Happy New Year! Yesterday, Lance and I got to carve out some time to do our annual New Year’s Eve date where we reflect on the year and look ahead to the new one. In our conversation, I was reminded just how much the Lord moved and made His timing clear to us. One of the reasons I LOVE reflection is because it is a reminder for how much the Lord provides and cares for us- even in the hard moments.

2023 was the year I chose the word: joy. As I wrote in last year’s reflection, I was hesitant to choose joy because I knew there was a chance the Lord would hand me some hard things as a way to teach that His joy goes beyond circumstances. I can now report how thankful I am that joy was my word for the year. With confidence, this was one of my more joy-filled years. It wasn’t joy-filled because everything worked out perfectly, but my eyes and heart were more eager to find joy even in the unexpected. The year as a whole held a lot of unexpected and broken things: windows, washing machines, the laptop, and even a car engine towards the end of the year. We had to replace A LOT of things this year. We said goodbye to the car we bought early on in our marriage and unexpectedly bought a new one. As someone who loves a good plan, the Lord taught me to loosen my grip on “my plans.” This year taught me to respond to things in a more even-keeled, calm, and joyful way.

In the middle of the year, I got an unexpected $330 dollar parking ticket for parking in a handicap spot to quickly run up and drop off library books. I was out of my car for 5-seconds when I turned and saw the parking enforcement officer already writing me a ticket. To be honest, I did not handle this very well. I pleaded with the officer and asked if “out of the goodness of his heart” he could not write the ticket. He wrote the ticket and when I saw the ticket amount I burst into loud tears. How unfair. I was really upset and I showed it. It wasn’t my most joy-filled moment of the year, but what followed is something only God could do. The very next morning, He reminded me that he cares for me and will always provide. I made a bundle sale for the curriculum I sell on Teachers Pay Teachers. I had not sold a bundle in months, so I knew this was His kindness to me. And he continued by moving in the heart of one of the parking enforcement officers by fully forgiving this parking violation. What grace!

I tell this story because it shows how short-sighted I can be. I was so consumed with an expensive parking ticket that I let it steal my joy. If I just would have waited a few more days I would have seen the Lord moving in such a way that showed me He cares for me and that there is no need to cry over parking tickets.

Going back to the fact that we had to deal with a lot of broken things this year…

While the initial broken item can bring on feelings of frustration and disappointment, I learned to pivot quicker and be thankful we were in a position to replace the item. And this pivot to gratitude is what helped me replace initial disappointment with joy. For example, when our dryer finally stopped working and we replaced it, I felt an abundant amount of joy every time I went to take a load out and all the clothes would actually be dry! For a long time, we were dealing with damp clothes and constantly have to re-run the dry cycle. This small thing brought joy and gratitude each time I would take out a new load.

While this year held a lot of small joys like dry clothes, iced matchas in the afternoon, and an organized linen closet; 2023 was also the year of big joy with finding out in February that we were pregnant and meeting our sweet boy, Declan in October. Adding another boy to our family has brought immense easy, joy to our final days of 2023 and has been yet another reminder of the Lord’s timing and plans always being greater than ours.

Just as 2023 started with some unexpected things, the year ended in an unexpected way as we were in the PICU for 3 nights with Declan. I wrote about that whole experience here. This seemed to be the final lesson of the year. I really felt like after a year learning to be less reactive and more joy-filled, the Lord gave us an especially challenging experience to point to our growth and our ability to handle hard and scary things with a grace and calmness that can only point to God.

And what joy to be home all together just in time for Christmas. It sure felt like the greatest gift to wake up in my own bed, hold a healthy Declan with no tubes attached, and have a lazy Saturday resting and playing at home. It was made even sweeter when a big box of donuts arrived from our sweet friends who were thinking of us. The whole experience was another reminder of what amazing community we have.

Those were the big points, but here are a few highlights from the year:

• Trips: Big Bear ski trip with friends from church, I had a trip to Oakland with my mom (kid-free!), Thatcher and I traveled with my side of the family to Minnesota for my Uncle’s celebration of life, and we had a family trip to San Diego for Lance’s half Ironman and Legoland.
• I read way less books and ran way less mileage.
• Lots of rain and indoor playgrounds
• So much growth for Hudson: he graduated from preschool, started kindergarten, and made some great friendships.
• Hudson fell in love with soccer this year! We almost didn’t even sign him up for ayso since he disliked it so much as a 3-year old. It was a great season with friends and it was so fun to watch his love for the sport form. Lance and him even got to watch the LMU’s men soccer team win and make it to the elite 8! He got the chance to do a couple soccer camps/clinics this year too.
• Found out we were having another boy with a gender reveal in San Clemente with our family.
• Celebrated Thatcher turning 2 at Disneyland and he got to see his favorite at the time, Buzz Lightyear.
• It was a special year for Thatcher and I. We got special one-on-one time on the Minnesota trip where he rode on a plane for the first time. The pilots were so nice and let him sit in the cockpit. We also got some good time together exploring and playing just the 2 of us during the fall when Hudson was fully in school and Declan was still in my tummy. He fully transformed into a toddler this year and is such a fun and goofy boy. He even got potty trained right before Delcan, which was perfect timing!
• Hudson turned 5 and we celebrated with Chuck E. Cheese, the Lego store, and a ninjago piñata. He also got a BIG bike and has been riding it so well.
• We welcomed a new nephew into our family and the boys are so happy to have another boy cousin!
• We did a lot of prepping at home for baby Declan and the big boys got settled into their shared room with awesome bunk beds.
• Halloween was very different this year with a newborn, but we trick or treated in the neighborhood with our ninja, Spider-Man and little pumpkin.
• In terms of my curriculum shop on Teachers Pay Teachers, it was another good year and I’m still amazed that my curriculum continues to sell despite little time spent. I look forward to pour more time into this shop when the boys get a bit older and my time frees up. I was happy to create a color curriculum for toddlers this year.
• This blog of mine continues to grow with each passing year and it’s beautiful to see growth in something that God nudged me to do 5 years ago. Visitors doubled from last year and that is again with very little time and writing. I wrote just 5 posts this year. I can’t wait to see what this space can become in the coming year.

This year taught me that even in the imperfect and when things do not go as planned, there is still lots of joy to be found. I learned to trust God in his timing and become more okay with doing less and being at home more.

2024: The Year of Being Steadfast

For 2024, my word is steadfast. In early November, I stumbled across the word in my morning devotional. The devotional referenced this Bible verse: “He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.” -Psalm 112:7

While I’m hoping I don’t need to face a ton of “bad news” this year; regardless of what this year gives, I’m striving to be steady in my responses and actions. I want to be be trained in “steadiness.” Whatever happens, I want to be the person that responds in a calm, confident and controlled way. I want to “lose it” less and less. I want my kids to notice- there’s something different about the way mom responds to both the good and the bad. I want the trash truck driver, the checkout clerk at Trader Joe’s, and the librarians I all see on a weekly basis to also notice this day in and day out steadiness.

Along with this Bible verse, there were two other quotations I stumbled across in my journals that I also want to keep in the forefront of my mind this year:

“The most extraordinary thing in the world is an ordinary man and an ordinary woman and their ordinary children.” -G.K. Chesterton

“Average obedience in the same direction is the simple thing that changes the world” -quoted in my devotional

In high school, I received the reward: “‘most likely to change the world” from my senior year English teacher. Now, I’m over 10 years out from high school and I sometimes wonder if she got that reward wrong. I don’t have a fancy career- it often doesn’t feel like I have the same impact as peers my age who have chosen and stayed in careers in education, medicine or law. But, these quotations above remind me that “changing the world” starts with the simple act of average obedience. And it’s doing this day in and day out. It isn’t fancy or showy. People aren’t always watching. It is a STEADY, consistent, reliable obedience. This is something I can do. And maybe, just maybe, I’ll be able to look back on my life and realize my English teacher was in fact right.

The final reason I chose the word steadfast is for the second part of the word- fast. My hope is to dedicate time to get back into running shape. My goal is run a big marathon, either NYC or CIM and get back to being FAST. It’s a comeback year and I can’t wait to start seeing the progress of being steady and consistent with mileage.

Thanks for being here and staying with me in this long, rambling reflection. I’m hopeful and excited for the year ahead. In just a few days I turn 30! So this year also marks the start of a new decade for me. I promise to have a full other post dedicated to reflecting on turning 30…

But for now, wishing you a wonderful year ahead!